hello, blogger

I guess I'm trying to see how long I can go between posts. A lot happens in a few months. This girl has been growing like a weed. Full blown conversations and just getting taller and taller by the day. She asks for food right before bed and something as soon as she wakes up. Somebody needs to tell her to stop. It helps that another little one will be arriving in the fall, but it doesn't completely erase the fact that she is turning into a her own little person.

january.

 the january daybook taken from this website. a lovely way to wrap up the month, and look forward to the rest of the year.

FOR TODAY

outside my window ::: a beautiful morning, but not so february like. it's warm out there.
I am thinking ::: what projects I can finish today, and if I really want to squeeze in the grocery shopping.
I am thankful ::: for my husband. I've been sick, and I suspect Penny hasn't been feeling good because of her horrible sleeping habits, and he's been there to help both his girls.
In the kitchen ::: a massive brisket waiting to be cooked.  empty wine glasses from a celebration last night.
I am wearing ::: gym shorts and a maternity shirt. I really need to change before I leave the house, but these are my comfy clothes.
I am creating ::: knitting away at some coffee sleeves. they're instant gratification knits. and making a new blanket for Penny.
I am going ::: I'm not sure...something to add to what I'm thinking about.
I am wondering ::: when this cold will pass. being sick is not something I do with grace.
I am reading ::: lots of gardening books. and just picked up a new Amish book from my mom [my family is obsessed with the amish lifestyle. so to feed that obsession, we read fiction books about their life].
I am hoping ::: to get out of the house some today. just have to bring lots of tissues along.
I am looking forward to ::: my birthday. it's the 24th of this month. Bruce is spoiling me this year. this rarely happens, because I tell him no, so I'm really excited for this one.
I am learning ::: to gauge my knitting projects. I like to jump in and say 'screw it', but of course the results aren't always what I hope for.
Around the house ::: it's been relatively clean all week! I attribute that to Bruce working a lot. he's my messiest babe.
I am pondering ::: what things February will bring. January has been a little more of handful than I expected and set out for it to be.
A favorite quote for today ::: I have favorite words for different days, but not exactly quotes. today's word would definitely be patience.
One of my favorite things ::: family time. we really have been lacking it the past few weeks with Bruce's schedule. there's nothing better than being around my favorite people.
A few plans for the rest of the week ::: friday is family day. we're going to a local BBQ joint that always seems to sell out before we get there. and then hit up some estate sales.
A peek into my day ::: the january sun. it's something i'll definitely miss.

check in.

Obsessing over: how fast I can get my 'to do' list done, and get back to knitting.
Thinking about: what Penny is trying to tell me. pretty sure she is trying to get me to take her to the 'whale store', but i'm not sure where that could be.
Anticipating: tomorrow night! we're going to start trying for baby #2. we're making an event out of it.
Listening to: see 'thinking about'. Penelope just keeps yelling 'whale store' at me.
Drinking: water with lemon.
Wishing: it was my birthday already. Bruce is buying me a new lens, i'm beyond grateful and excited!

my girl.

I've been too busy lately hanging out with this girl to update this blog. It's amazing how big she's gotten over the past few months. I promise myself I'll update more...just as soon as we're done playing..

monday.

  

Obsessing over: what project to work on next. valentines or refinishing the dresser. too many options.
 Working on: getting my daughter out of the house and to the park.
Thinking about: dinner. the next meal is always on my mind.
Anticipating: getting the gym over with today.
Drinking: ice cold water.
Wishing: see anticipating: wishing the gym was just over. i don't want to go! but i'll push through anyways.

Growing.

About 60% of the time, this is the only way Penelope will sleep. With her back arched and her head directly on my bladder (today I rolled her down to my legs). As bad as I feel when I wake up, I really hold onto these moments where she needs me. She wants to be near me. She still feels like my baby.

I feel like she's growing up and changing so fast my eyes can't keep up. With her clothes getting smaller and her personality getting bigger, it really makes me focus on how i'm changing during all of this. Where am I going and what are my goals? Sometimes it feels like I have all the choices in the world, and that's what kills me. Choices are not a good thing for me. I need to be told what to do or given two or three options. College? Hardest thing ever for me to finish because I don't know what to do. I don't want to mess up and go down the wrong path. I've been refinishing a lot of furniture lately, baking a lot, taking pictures of every moment of our lives, and writing nonstop. I love all of these things but focusing on one is so hard. I have learned that i'm not happy with a hobby unless it's hands on. Sweating and being sore because i've worked so hard at something makes me smile beyond belief. There is so many possibilities for me and our family, I hope we figure out the road that's right for us.

Summer.

Summer is here. School is over. This mama is beyond happy. I have a ton of free time and so many things to fill it with. So far, i've read an entire book in two days. TWO DAYS. I've become addicted to iced tea with lemon. I've watched my neighbor clean out her pool and drool over how good the water is going to feel when it's open and I can hop in (yes, we were invited over, i'm not going to invite myself!). With school going on, enjoying these little things was never possible. I can feel joy seeping back into my life. And I am loving it.

This little angel has been enjoying the extra time spent outdoors. Today I mowed the back yard while she played in her sandbox and daddy sat next to her. They both clapped & cheered as I zoomed by with the mower, letting me know that my hard work did not go unnoticed.  I have two of the best friends in the world.